Like right now. Mike’s gonna get the job, second interview tomorrow but I’m sure it’s nailed.
Now to move on myself- if I’m not immediately fired, which is always a possibility (and not necessarily an alarming one).
I will ponder this as I lay down to nap. Adieu.
So perhaps my recent melancholy has been due to the impending birthday. I didn’t think it bothered me, and I’m still looking forward to a whole kind of fresh start, but reflecting on the past decade hasn’t filled me with anything but a sullen kind of regret.
I’ll write more later, just checking in.
OK, I didn’t update yesterday. If you’re looking for a description of the day, just re-read the Saturday post and switch the title. That was the primary distinction between the two.
Been in a negative mood all morning. Cataloging various shortcomings and areas of disappointment. It’s turned in to quite a lengthy list. I’m not going to repeat it here. I need to make a change, that much is certain. Moving isn’t the answer, I don’t think. No matter where you go blah blah blah. I need to really get writing again on scripts, I’m just having an unbearable time trying to summon up the will to do, well, anything.
Here’s my day, thus far:
Breakfast at Jack in the Box
smoke
yahoo, huffingtonpost, digg, techcrunch, joystiq, tmz
smoke
perezhilton, slashdot, techmeme, osnews, cnn, fox
smoke
xboxfanyboy, wowinsider, gizmodo, lifehacker, boingboing
lunch
Here, 1.57 pm.
Idiot is behind me, so at least typing looks kind of like I’m actually doing something. I was bummed out because it was Monday, until it occurred to me that it didn’t matter. Every day is exactly the same, all that varies is the amount of hours I spend here, in proportion to naps and game time.
I realize these resound with negativity, but that’s where I’m at right now; those are the facts on the ground, that’s the reality. I’m going to rewrite 5 pages today, and make that my goal: 5 pages of rewrites a day, or done by the end of October. I can do that. I have to do that, because I’m losing my mind.
Spending mucho dinero is out of the question- I’m gonna have 2 bills this week, and next “free check” has to carry over to help pay November rent, then rinse, repeat, etc. I really really need another source of income, or, better still, a new job that pays more. I’m kinda sliding along here. I’m not planning on getting birthday funds either, which is fine, but saving up for Christmas flight is going to be difficult.
Anyway, it’s nice out, but I can’t think of anything to do. Was going to go see a horror show at Culver, but it’s not playing any more and there’s nothing else there I’m dying to see. M&M are going to Knott’s Berry Farm for some halloween thing, but I can’t toss 60 bucks away today so I’m in here, looking for music and keeping it semi-real.
So here’s a map of French Guiana:
Slow. Damn slow. Mike got his call from Variety, so he’s a happy camper. I’m sure he’ll get the job, he’s more than qualified- way too much to be in this shithole. Now I just need to find something better suited (or, hell, suited period) for my talents. Such as they are.
Dreams lately have revolved around exes- specifically, Allison and Becca. I even had one about Ryon last week. It would seem that relationships/companionship is at the forefront of my subconscious. Some sexual, others hostile, all of them leave me drained when I wake up.
I blame them, and some other recent states of mind, on the fact that I’m turning 30 in less than a month. I’m not having a crisis or anything, but it’s given me plenty of pause as I assess/do damage control on the past decade.
Yeah, our connection at work is sucking huge today. Seriously, it took me like 30 seconds to open this page. Considering it’s all I do all day, this is a pretty big deal.
Getting paid today, less than exciting since I don’t get to keep a single dime of it- in fact, I have to throw in an extra hundred bucks just to cover rent.
Ran into Scott last night, had a club soda at the bar and chatted with him over a burger at Johnny’s (the reason I left the house in the first place). Had boysenberry pie, which I think I might be getting tired of. Too many seeds.
Raid tonight, which should be 100 percent unfun. As for the rest of the weekend, I dunno. I might go see a movie, even though the one I want to see isn’t playing anywhere near me. I should probably clean. Yes, it’s shaping up to be a real roller coaster.
As it stands right now, it’s 10:35 AM and getting earlier.
Lest my dailies turn into brief asides on the never-changing state of the weather, I’m going to talk about something else this Thursday morning. Holiday plans.
My plan is to take 5 vacation days off the week of Christmas, bookending it with 2 weekends for a total of nine glorious days away from it all and at home with the family. I have to figure out the way around the ticket necessitating a credit card, but aside from that it should be no big deal.
My family is going up north for Thanksgiving to Milwaukee, but I’m not going to be able to meet them there. I also don’t want to go to Phoenix in the slightest, which has an out of the frying pan into the fire feel to it (one desert for another, drier one).
Today’s dad’s birthday, the old man turns 59 and is still 3 times healthier than I am. Shame.
Ah, well. The startup company covering Warcraft/Second Life that I edited for in August is kaput. I figured it was coming, since they didn’t really fill any demanded niche, but it’s unfortunate nonetheless. It was a good experience, I made some money, such is freelance. Time to move on and find something else, such is life.
|
Twittage Music List
